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    Enjoy These Obamacarols at Your Family Christmas Gathering!

    12/23/2013

    Are you all ready for Christmas? I know I have a couple things left to do, a little last-minute grocery shopping and such. You know how these things go. One of the most important things I have left to do, though, is to make myself ready to talk to my family about Obamacare on Christmas Day. The President, his wife, and the horde of wild-eyed...err, patriotic...Americans who work tirelessly for Organizing for Action* have informed us it is our duty to impress on our friends and family how crucial it is we sign up for the Affordable Care Act tout de suite**.

    Obamacare-ol

    I'm a responsible and patriotic citizen, so naturally I wanted to help. Here, then, are some carols for Obamacare -- Obamacarols! -- you can sing with your family as you gather around the computer monitor for the hours and hours it'll likely take you to get signed up for your brand-new health care plan. (tweetable)

    Pajama Boy is Coming to Town!

    (Sung to the tune of...oh, come on. You know this one, right?)

    (tweetable)

    You’d better watch out!
    You’d better not cry!
    You’d better not pout.
    I’m telling you why.
    Pajama Boy is coming to town!

    He's bringing a list
    That he's checked out twice.
    With all of the reasons
    The ACA is nice.
    Pajama Boy is coming to town!

    He's decked out in plaid jammies
    With footies on them too.
    He's carrying hot cocoa
    Which he might just share with you!

    Oh! You'd better eat fast.
    And clean up real quick.
    Get ready to listen
    If your skull is not too thick.
    Pajama Boy is coming to town.

    He's got links to the website
    Where you can sign up quick
    Assuming that it's working
    And the programmers haven't gone home sick

    So, you'd better watch out
    You'd better not cry.
    Break out the fuzzy slippers
    And the artisanal vegan organic free-trade cruelty-free pie.
    Pajama Boy is coming to town!

    Obamacare

    (Sung to the tune of "O Christmas Tree")

    (tweetable)

    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    How grateful we are for thee!
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    How grateful we are for thee!
    We did not read what’s in the law
    But it’s okay. It won’t be flawed.
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    How grateful we are for thee!

    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    We love your lifelong coverage!
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    We love your lifelong coverage!
    On our parents’ plan we will stay.
    Who needs to grow up anyway?
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    We love your lifelong coverage!

    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    You cover everybody!
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    You cover everybody!
    You do not care what pre-exists.
    Cost is just a tea party myth.
    Obamacare. Obamacare.
    You cover everybody!

    The First Month

    (Sung to the tune of "The First Noel)

    (tweetable)

    The first month is free, Obama did say
    Thanks to evil insurers he threatened to slay.
    In boardrooms where they sat counting their cash,
    Gleaned from sick, poor, and old people they want to smash.
    No pay, no pay. No pay, no pay!
    Our President gave us all health care today.

    He look-ed up and saw a glitch.
    In his web site that should launch without a hitch.
    And so he sprang to fix the mistake
    And rescue Obamacare for all of our sake.
    No pay, no pay. No pay, no pay!
    Free stuff is our right; you can't take it away.

    Then came to him Republicans foul
    Bearing votes to repeal and O boy did they scowl!
    But our President told them, "Talk to my hand!"
    "The Affordable Care Act is the law of the land!"
    No pay, no pay. No pay, no pay!
    Three cheers for Obama! Hip, hip hooray!

    Now let us sing with one accord
    And tack "Get Covered Now" flyers on all bulletin boards.
    Tell family and friends and even strangers, too.
    Obama has saved us from the cruel winter flu!
    No pay, no pay. No pay, no pay!
    Money's no object when someone else pays!

    Merry Christmas, everyone!

    * The group that is in no way connected closely to the White House even though they seem to have the White House's talking-points in near-instant fashion and use the BarackObama.com web address that used to be the site for the President's re-election campaign.

    ** That's French for "before it collapses under the weight of impossible promises, too few healthy enrolees, and hordes of sick people slamming into Medicaid like an NFL offensive line stampeding an elderly nun".

    (Music image by the incomparable national treasure, Jon Gabriel)

     

     

    For those who may need to receive a sense of humor for the holidays, these lyrics are of course satire.  We hope it made you chuckle, and gave you something to smile about, even if the news about ObamaCare is less than cheerful. - Kristina Ribali 

    2 comments
    avon lady
    12/28/2013

    How do you make those "Tweetable" sections in your blog?

    stonestone's picture
    stone stone
    12/23/2013

    If you don't know what the phrase: "Jumped the shark" means, I'd suggest looking it up because if you all are now down to immature posts like this then that tells me this thing- whatever its supposed to be- indeed jumped the shark. Get over it.

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